1,282 Miles

roadsThis coming Monday is Memorial Day. And I have fond memories of spending this holiday weekend back in Michigan enjoying (finally) warming weather and backyard barbecues. Char-grilled hot dogs, hand-pressed hamburgers, and potato salad. What could be better, right?

Well, I’ll get to relive those memories.

I’ll be making the trip back to Michigan a bit earlier than planned, and will leave for the 1,282-mile door-to-door journey this coming Saturday afternoon. I’ll arrive Sunday, mid-morning, and after some light unpacking and a hearty nap, I’ll be ready to start a new lifestyle in Michigan. And what better time than an early summer holiday?

Unfortunately, however, this earlier trip wasn’t my idea.

Rather, these changes have been incredibly difficult on my current partner and I. And it’s been this really unique situation where we talked about these impending changes quite a while ago. I’ve been with my girlfriend for almost five years now, and as soon as I knew my feelings about moving back were real, I sat down and told her. As such, we went through a roller coaster of emotions, and we’re both very upset about what amounts to us going our separate ways. While we plan on remaining friends no matter what, there’s a good chance this move will result in our permanent separation.

Between the time we initially talked about all of this and now, we’ve gone from realizing and absorbing the change to getting comfortable with one another again as we go through regular routines like grocery shopping together, eating together, and doing our day-to-day activities together. Because of this, there hasn’t been any time to move on or deal with our loss of one another. And when she does try to realize that I’m leaving and move on, our situation where I’m still here and we’re living together makes it impossible.

As such, she asked me if I could move to Michigan earlier than originally planned and I obliged. I don’t want to hurt her any more than I already have, and this change has been incredibly hard on her. I feel terrible about it, but at the same time I can’t ignore the fact that I want to be closer to family. Unfortunately, we reach an impasse whenever I try to reconcile my desire to live closer to family while still maintaining our relationship together. At this point, there’s either staying here in Florida and we stay together, or I move back home and spend time with family, but I do so without her. We’ve gone through various scenarios where the choices aren’t mutually exclusive, like me living there six months per year and here the other six. But any ideas we come up with are really just not realistic, comfortable, or fair to the parties involved over the long haul. She might be interested in moving up there at some point in the future, but it’s just not the time for her right now. Or, of course, I could freak out when winter hits and come crawling back to Florida. Never say never.

As incredibly difficult as this is, I’ll be packing what little personal possessions I own in my little Toyota on Saturday morning and then making the drive. It’s about 18 hours total, and I’ll likely make the drive all in one shot. Of course, we’ll see how my energy levels do, and if I get tired I’ll find a rest stop, park, and take a nap as I recline my driver’s seat back a little. No hotel stays for this frugalist!

I’ll be turning in the cable modem early Friday afternoon, so between that time and Sunday afternoon when I’m settled in back home I’ll be unavailable. As soon as I have an opportunity to do so I’ll update everyone on the situation, and I really look forward to resuming the blog from the Arctic North!

Meanwhile, I hope you all have a wonderful holiday weekend. I’ll see you all on the other side in a couple days!

Thank you all for the incredible support. This is a tough, but exciting time for me, and the encouragement from you readers means the world to me!

Full Disclosure: Long optimism.

Thanks for reading.

Photo Credit: digitalart/FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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106 Comments

  1. Great post Mantra! It is truly great to follow your journey. “Long optimism” I like that! 🙂 Regards from Sweden.

  2. Good luck with the upcoming change, DM. I wish nothing but the best for you. I also like the “Full Disclosure: Long optimism.”

    Keep up the good work. I’ll keep checking for regular updates.

  3. Good Luck! I know it’s difficult to leave someone you really care about behind, but being closer to family seems like it will make you happier. As you said, you never know what will happen in the future and you may part ways for good or find yourselves together at some point down the road. Be careful on the drive up and we’ll be waiting for the next entry on the FI road.

  4. Jason,

    I’ve been a follower of your blog for about six months now, and I admire the tough decision you’ve made. Telling your partner that what’s best for your is to leave is crushing, and someday I may have to have the same conversation.

    Also, I’d like to thank you. It was your blog that inspired me to start funneling my investment funds in to high quality dividend growth stocks and to begin blogging about my journey.

    I also live in Michigan in the metro-Detroit area, and would be love to start a financial independence coaching group with us fellow Michiganders.

    Josh

  5. DM,

    We are pulling hard for you bud. Keep your head up and forge ahead! Make it a safe trip home.

    MDP

  6. Drive safe, man. Hope everything works in your favor! Look forward to hearing from you later on….

    Dave

  7. good luck on the ride and have a redbull or two. Ya it is not easy relocating on a relationship, took us years for things to adjust to the new normal.

  8. I can’t imagine how difficult this break up must be for both of you. Having bonded with someone who has shared your amazing journey makes it all the more difficult. Sorry my friend. 🙁

    I’m guessing you will be heading up I-75? If so and you find yourself mid-way through the Bluegrass State and are need of a break from the road I would be delighted to treat you to breakfast, lunch, dinner or even a midnight snack. Let me know what your schedule is like.

    Safe travels,

    The Stoic

  9. DM,

    It takes alot of courage to follow your heart and do what is best for you and your family. I am sure this move, along with the change in job is a huge amount of stuff to take in at one time, but i am sure it will be for the better! Family is one of the most important things in life…and one of the main reasons we as investors are on this dividend growth investing journey in the first place. The time you spend with close family and friends is priceless. Good luck man, i will be looking forward to more blog postings. Checking this website has become a morning ritual for me, much like coffee and breakfast!

    Josh

  10. Safe journey, Jason. Again, the parallels in our lives. When I decided to move back to MI in 1984, my wife said, “no way am I moving to the frozen tundra”. 3 weeks later she quit her job and moved north to join me. Your story will differ, of course, but you never know what tomorrow will bring. May God bless both of you (and her son!) whatever may come.

  11. That’s tough thing to go through, thanks for sharing your story. I am a big believer in everything happens for a reason, best of luck on the journey.

  12. Deep down you probably saw this coming. Of course that doesn’t make it any easier. Tough break but your Full Disclosure is right on point. Good luck with your move – 18 hours is a long time to reflect about what you’re leaving behind and where you’re going… I’m sure you’ll figure it out!

  13. Tough situation DM, but no doubt you’ll make the best of whatever decisions you commit to. You seem to have a pretty good handle on your own personal values.

    Being ‘long optimism’ (brilliant!) will take you a long way – and luckily you’re a buy-and-hold kind of guy. Hold on to that optimism! Safe drive!

    Cheers,

    Jason

  14. thehappypotamus,

    Thank you. I really appreciate the support!

    And I’m definitely long optimism! How can one not be when life is so full of promise? Although I’m sad to leave a wonderful relationship behind, I honestly have so much to look forward to and be thankful for. You readers are pretty high on that list, so thank you again. 🙂

    Thanks for checking in.

    Cheers!

  15. Clint,

    It’s unfortunate to be in this unique situation where I’m choosing between a wonderful partner and a fantastic family, but I’ve got it pretty good. She’s been really supportive throughout this entire process, and she doesn’t blame me at all for going home. She’s spent a lot of time around my family, and knows how close I am to them and how great they are. So she totally gets it.

    And you definitely never know what the future will bring. I honestly didn’t think I’d be moving back to Michigan right now. Life can take you by surprise sometimes, even when you’re planning things out so far in advance. But I’d say that’s a good thing. 🙂

    Thanks for the support and encouragement!

    Best wishes.

  16. Josh,

    Hey, so glad to hear you found some inspiration here to start your own journey and blog. That’s fantastic. I just stopped by your blog, and I love the layout. Really enjoyed the Europe vs. America post there. It’s too bad that many of the great cities in Europe are so expensive compared to living in America. However, one of my regular readers lives in Bulgaria. He lives on $250/month, so I guess Europe isn’t too bad after all. Pretty amazing stuff. Although, it looks like you’re getting by on $750/month if I’m reading that correctly, so that’s mighty impressive for living in Michigan!

    And, yes! Maybe us fellow Michiganders will have to get something going at some point. I’d love to be associated with anything that gets people thinking about their financial futures, so count me in. 🙂

    Appreciate you stopping by! And I wish you nothing but the best of luck with both your journey and blog.

    Take care.

  17. MDP,

    Thanks, man. I really appreciate it.

    I just had the Corolla freshly serviced, so I should be good for the trip. 🙂

    Keep up the great work with the regular investments. You’re killing it over there!

    Best regards.

  18. Dave,

    Thank you. I’m confident this big move is going to bring about some great changes in my life, and I’m really excited to put out some great content from Michigan. 🙂

    Stay in touch!

    Cheers.

  19. Asset-Grinder,

    Haha. I may need some serious caffeine when it’s four in the morning and the road is just a long, dark blur. 🙂

    There’s definitely going to be some adjustments necessary once I’m up there, but we’ll see how it goes.

    Thanks for stopping by!

    Take care.

  20. Hi Jason ~ I’m a new reader, but nonetheless an inspired one. Hoping an ideal solution may present itself down the road. Regardless, all the best in your new venture with your sis and new niece or nephew. Safe driving and we’ll look forward to hear from you up North.

  21. To DM

    Hi Jason, first and foremost, drive safely! I know you have done it before, so it’s not a crazy idea to drive such a long distance all at once. I hope you will have a tiring and yet exciting time on the road because you know what’s ahead of you. Although it’s only a couple of months since I came across your blog but I’ve been an avid reader as learning more about DGI as a rookie and in large your thoughts and insight have been instrumental in terms of covering the basics. Still a lot to learn and that is why I am following every step of the way in your journey, and I wish nothing but the best. Hope you rest a bit once you check in yourself with your family and we see you soon right back here. Good luck, and thanks. 

  22. The Stoic,

    First, congrats on all the skills you’ve been learning as you rehab that house of yours. You’ve got the skills to kill, my friend. Pretty amazing stuff! House is looking great! 🙂

    And thanks so much for the kind offer there. I’d love to take you up on it, but I’m hoping to land early Sunday so I can unload, nap, and then get ready for some Memorial Day festivities. I wasn’t planning on going up so soon, but when it was suggested that I leave earlier I became interested in making the most of it.

    I do hope, however, that we meet up at some point. Would love to meet some fellow bloggers here some day. I don’t know if I’m going to make the big FinCon event this year with everything going on right now, but I’m definitely interested in meeting you guys! 🙂

    Keep up the great work over there, my friend. Really incredible stuff!

    Best wishes.

  23. Josh,

    Family is indeed so incredibly important. And every time I would travel back to Michigan I would see my parents getting just a little older and my siblings all getting married and starting their own lives. It started to really worry me that I was missing out on too much. When I first moved to Florida, my sisters were all basically still in school and what I thought of as “little girls”. Although that’s not really true, that’s what they still were to me. Now they’re in their own homes, getting married, and having children. What a change. And I want to be part of that change.

    And though it takes courage to do what I’m doing, I’m so lucky to have the incredible support of my family, you readers, and even my girlfriend. I’m just so incredibly lucky! 🙂

    Thanks for your support and readership. I really appreciate it. I hope you continue to stop by and stay in touch!

    Best regards.

  24. KiethX,

    Really interesting and wonderful parallels there. Although I hope that my situation will turn out like that, I also believe it’s probably unrealistic. But that’s okay. Changes allow us to grow and improve as individuals, and I’m looking forward to new challenges and opportunities.

    Thank you very much for the kind words and blessings. I’m hopeful that this move is ultimately a wonderful change for me. I’m definitely going to make the most of it. 🙂

    Glad the move worked out for you and your wife. She followed you up, and as they say – the rest is history.

    Best wishes!

  25. evenstevenmoney,

    Thanks! Life can be kind of crazy sometimes, even when you plan and plan and plan. But that’s what makes it interesting, right? 🙂

    Appreciate you stopping by!

    Take care.

  26. insourcelife,

    Great point there. The long road trip will allow me plenty of time to reflect on what I’m doing and how these changes might impact the rest of my life. It’s such a bittersweet time in my life right now, but I’m ultimately proud of what I’ve accomplished and excited for what tomorrow brings. I’ve been incredibly lucky to have such a great partner to support my vision over these last 4+ years. I feel so bad about leaving right now, but I know she understands my reasons. But you never know what will happen in the future; she may decide to adventure north. 🙂

    Appreciate the support. Thank you very much. You readers are so fantastic. Couldn’t do it without ya!

    Best wishes.

  27. Jason,

    First, thank you again for featuring me earlier. That was really kind of you. Appreciate it very much!

    And I’m glad you liked my optimism line. I believe optimism is so powerful. How you respond to events in life is so much more important than the actual events themselves. The old lemons into lemonade adage. Simple, but so true! Love your optimism and buy-and-hold analogy there. Great stuff. 🙂

    Hope all is well for you!

    Best regards.

  28. AFFJ,

    Thanks! I’m hoping it’s a nice, smooth trip.

    And I’m looking forward to updating you guys. It’s all really exciting for me, but I’m hoping to have more time to write than ever before. 🙂

    Congrats, by the way, on your recent investment in TGT. I think that’s a solid buy here, but I’m hoping they can turn things around in Canada.

    Cheers.

  29. debt debs,

    Glad to have you on board as a new reader! I hope you continue to stop by. I have so much material already sketched up, and I’m truly excited for what the next few months will bring. 🙂

    This new venture is definitely not what I had planned for this year, but I’m also more alive than ever before. I was really just going through the motions before with work and everything, and now I feel so inspired and energized. It’s really great stuff.

    Appreciate the support!!

    Best wishes.

  30. DIR,

    Well, when I did the drive before, back in 2009, I drove straight through. I think I made it in about 17 hours, which is just ridiculous time. However, I was really flying. This time, I’m going to take it a bit easier. But I think I might be able to make 18 hours or so. 🙂

    And I’m glad you found the blog and you’ve learned a few things since stopping by. I have a lot more planned for this blog, and I’m excited to write more and more content in the future. So I do hope you stick around! 🙂

    Stay in touch.

    Best regards.

  31. “Long Optimism” Absolutely!

    I’ve been through painful breakups in the past, it’s difficult to describe the pain and the roller coaster of emotions that ensue. I remember thinking to myself, “how can humans feel this much pain? and why?”

    But you have a very nice graphic in this post: the road ahead. There’s literal and figurative signifcance to that, but mainly it means you have an optimistic outlook ahead of you.

    Have a safe trip, but don’t be afraid to take it easy along the way!

  32. A tough decision for you to take, Jason. I hope it’ll work out fine for you. Nothing is more important in live than love & friendship. Even not passive income 

    Have a save trip…
    Jos

  33. I’ve been monitoring and reading your blog since I deployed to the Middle East in mid-February 2014. Your story is inspirational and has provided continuous motivation to me as a Soldier. As you make your long march north and chart a new course in life, I wish you the best of luck!

    Best Regards,
    Jeremy

  34. Good Luck on your new path. I am both excited for you and sad for you at the same time. It is important to have a partner in life.

    1282/18. = 72 miles an hour with no stops.
    Holiday weekend = tons of speed traps

    If I were making that trip, I would slow things down and make sure to see some of the sights along the way. After all, half the fun of traveling is the journey.

    Safe travels!

    Roger H

  35. How far off I-75 is it for you to do a Jack Daniels tour (free)? Then drive through Nashville and grab a beer at a Honky Tonk ($5)? You ride right through Atlanta the home of KO. isn’t there something to check out on the way?

    You want to travel – you are traveling through 5 states. What’s the rush?

    Good luck.

  36. I’ve been reading your blog for about a month now. Let me start off by saying, only a fool would move back to Michigan. That includes myself. I left Michigan after college because their were no jobs in Detroit. I just moved back to Metro Detroit 7 months ago and experienced the worst winter in history.

    In all honesty, you have inspired me to research dividend investing and look at different streams of income outside of my job. If I ever get laid off, I want to have other “safety” ropes while I am looking for a new job.

    I am also from Michigan. If you don’t mind me asking where are you moving to? I am from the Southfield area.

  37. I’m with you, Jason. I might suggest reading “Taking the Leap” by Pema Chodron. I have recently divorced and found her Budist backed outlook incredibly helpful. I started following you about a year ago and you have inspired me to take the leap and invest in dividend paying stocks… I have found that my subscriptions to Morningstar, F.A.S.T. Graphs, and VURU have really helped me make more intelligent decisions. All the best, TJ

  38. Hi Jason,

    I have been following you for a while now and I always enjoy your posts!

    FL to MI is a big move and I wish you well!

    Looking forward to updates!

    Ray

  39. Wowww ROAD TRIP TIME!!!! Haha… So happy for you man, and hopefully the two of you come out better for this 🙂 The good thing is that nothing’s ever permanent anyways right? Who knows what the future will bring as you allude to.

    Now. If you find yourself going through Virginia and need a pit stop, shoot me an email and I’ll fill your tum-tum with coffee and food. Regardless, be safe and enjoy the mission!

  40. J. Money – you know it Virginia is the place!

    DM – I bet you could couch surf up to your house, no reason to sleep in the car when someone would probably lend you a spare room for a night. Either way enjoy the North, there are a bunch of good things about MI, but hockey, beer, and the lake fronts come to mind first.

    – Gremlin

  41. Safety driving allways!
    Sorry about your separation, it seems you really Luke each other.

    I wish you all .

  42. Hey DM,

    Quite a touching post…

    This is a long stretch and I am just speculating, but consider that if at some point, you are able to live exclusively on the income you make writing, this will give you an immense freedom. No more schedules, bosses or being forced to be somewhere at some time. It might be possible for you to live in Florida with her and visit your family regularly, or live in Michigan and visit Florida often and keep the relationship going.

    Once again, best of lucks with your move!

    Also, I found this way too funny “Full Disclosure: Long optimism”.

    Best wishes,
    Dividend Venture

  43. 1200 miles will bea journey of some 20+ hours. Beyond the 12 hour mark you might as well start drinking, because you are just as dangerous on the road as a tired driver as you are a drunk driver. Add in an emotionally charged state under the circumstances and the probablity for an accident go way up …
    Plan on a meaningful stop. Frugality shouldn’t override good judgement.

  44. Ian,

    Thanks. I’ll miss some of the interaction with you guys for the next few days, but I’m looking forward to getting back to it in a few days.

    In the meantime, I hope you have a great holiday weekend!

    Best wishes.

  45. Spoonman,

    Thanks. I love your take on it. There’s definitely a long, interesting road ahead of me – figuratively and literally. And I’m looking forward to seeing how I end up on the other side. I’m really happy right now, so it’s weird in that this journey isn’t meant to make me happier. Rather, it’s simply meant to bring me closer to a lot of people in my life I miss and love. And I just hope I can at least maintain my happiness; this journey would really suck if it reduced my overall happiness in life. 🙂

    And breakups are always difficult. Especially so when there is still feelings there. We’re not breaking up because we don’t care about each other anymore or one of us cheated or something crazy…rather, it’s just this separation due to a lot of outside forces. So it’s really unique and painful. But as I alluded to before, it’s not like it’s all my family. There is also a pretty significant age difference there, and she’s not particularly enamored with the ideas of early retirement or living frugally. She doesn’t spend a lot of money, but she also views some of the methods I employ as extreme. Which is understandable.

    At any rate, life is full of ups, downs, and changes. And I’ve always been the type to roll with the punches and seek out the best in any situation, and this will be no different.

    Thanks for all the support! 2014 will be an interesting and exciting year for us both, it seems.

    Best regards!

  46. Jos,

    Completely with you. Love and friendship trumps all. However, keep in mind this decision isn’t driven by money or passive income; if that was at the heart of the matter, I’d still be making much more money at the dealership and saving/investing like never before. 🙂

    Rather, this is all about family and loved ones. I’m at a spot in my life where I no longer want to live so far away from everyone. My parents are getting up there in age, and my sisters are starting to build families. It’s this really awesome juncture in our family, and I don’t want to miss it. So I’m actually giving up quite a bit of income potential to go back and see them. But I feel confident that I’m at a spot in my journey to where I can afford to slow down a bit and still get pretty close to my ultimate goal. And I’m also hopeful that I can live cheaper up there and focus more on writing, which is what really brings me a lot of joy. We’ll see how this change works out.

    Thanks for the well wishes! I’ll be safe. 🙂

    Cheers!

  47. Jeremy,

    Thanks so much! It sounds like you’re familiar with long journeys and change in your life. I wish you nothing but safe journeys over where you’re at, and also know that we all appreciate your service very much!!!

    Stay in touch. 🙂

    Take care.

  48. Roger H,

    Well, I’m not in a particular rush. However, this is a unique road trip. There are some barbecues and some other events that I’m looking forward to up in Michigan, and if I make this a 2-3 day trip I’ll miss out on that. Plus, my sister and her husband work during the week, so if I show up on Tuesday or Wednesday I won’t have anyone there to let me in or help me with some of the heavier items I have (television, etc.). Not that we couldn’t make other arrangements, but it would be much nicer to arrive when there are people there and I can kind of settle in with the company. All in all, I’m hoping to get there early Sunday so I can spend time with everyone on Memorial Day. 🙂

    But I’m definitely interested in travel. Just not sure if this is the best trip for that with all my stuff loaded in the car and what not. Plus, I’d prefer to travel with someone else rather than by myself.

    I appreciate the suggestions, however. And I’ve been to Nashville before. That’s a really fun town. I actually would love to go back at some point!

    Hope all is well for you.

    Cheers!

  49. Steve,

    Haha. I guess I’m a fool. In all seriousness, I don’t disagree with you. If this were a decision driven by economics, I wouldn’t be moving back. I’d stay right where I am. However, my family and friends live in Michigan, so that’s where I’m going. There’s always a possibility this isn’t a permanent change. But with my parents getting a little older and my siblings having children, I want to be there for moments and memories I’d otherwise miss by living down here. Of course, there are many things I’m not looking forward to: a rough economy, bad weather for 4-5 months per year, potholes, driving everywhere, lack of public transportation, snow, etc.

    I’m actually moving to Durand – it’s a small town between Lansing and Flint. Not my first choice, but my family lives around there. So from there I’ll see how things go and what my new life looks like.

    And I’m glad you’ve found some inspiration here. That’s why I write! 🙂

    Best wishes.

  50. RBD,

    Thanks so much! I’m hoping for a safe and enjoyable trip.

    And leaving early was the least I could do. Life is funny sometimes. I didn’t see any of this coming, but such is life. I actually planned to live here in Florida permanently with perhaps some summer visits to Michigan once I was FI, but I was starting to regret living so far away. As such, I knew changes had to be made.

    Appreciate all the support!

    Best regards.

  51. TJ,

    Those are some great services you’re using there! F.A.S.T. is something I hear great things about; I may have to subscribe at some point. 🙂

    And thanks for the book suggestion. I’ll have to check it out.

    Appreciate you stopping by. And sorry to hear about your divorce. Always tough to split with someone. I hope that it was for the best for you two.

    Take care.

  52. Ray,

    Thank you! Appreciate the readership. 🙂

    I’m really looking forward to updating you guys and pumping out more great content once I’m up there. Stay tuned!

    Cheers.

  53. J. Money,

    You’re right, brother. Nothing is ever permanent. We never know what the future will bring. I certainly didn’t see moving back to Michigan in the cards, but my damn family has to go and be so awesome and make me miss them. 🙂

    I appreciate the offer! VA is a little off the path for me, but I do hope at some point we get to meet. Really admire and appreciate your work!

    Thank you for all the support. Means the world to me.

    Best wishes.

  54. Gremlin,

    Hockey, beer, and lake fronts. That pretty much sums it up! 🙂

    I’m actually a huge Red Wings fan, so it’ll be nice to be able to watch the games again. I don’t really drink, but I think Grand Rapids won a few competitions for beer not long ago – most breweries, or something?

    And couch surfing sounds really fun! I’m hoping to get up there for Memorial Day barbecues, so I don’t know if it’s in the cards for this trip, but I wouldn’t mind trying it in the future.

    Best regards.

  55. Arizona Trader,

    Thanks. I’m hoping for a safe trip too. I’m probably going to take it a little easier/slower than when I initially moved down here. A little older now and all that. 🙂

    Take care.

  56. PIM,

    You never know what the future will bring, right? And maybe at some point life will bring us back together again. Both of us plan to stay in touch with one another and continue to love and support each other from afar. In the meanwhile, we’re both optimistic about the changes.

    Appreciate the support! Hope all is well for you.

    Best regards.

  57. Dividend Venture,

    Absolutely! Living part-time in more than one spot may be possible for me in the future, dependent on how much income I can generate from my writing/online activities. Wouldn’t that be cool? I’d be the youngest snowbird around! 🙂

    Appreciate all the support. And glad to hear everything worked out well for you and your wife recently!

    Best wishes.

  58. CP,

    Well, as I stated in the post I’m going to stop and take a nap if I’m tired. We’ll see how it goes. When I moved down here the first time I did it one shot at about 17 hours. I’m going to move a little slower this time, but I think 18-19 hours is realistic. Maybe 22 if I stop and take a nice nap.

    And I agree frugality shouldn’t override good judgement. However, it’s still quite frugal to stop and take a nap in the car. 🙂

    Cheers.

  59. Good luck with the move and have a safe drive. I know you want to do it in one shot, but take it easy and rest if you’re tired. I can’t drive that long anymore. Sorry to hear about the relationship. It’s hard, but hopefully you two remain friends.

  60. Best of luck in the big move!

    As a side note – have you considered a part of this website that would be for us to initiate questions to you? The current format (unless I am missing something) is that you make a post and we can respond to that post (or not). I think there may be some interesting discussions to be had where the readers initiate the subject, sort of like a mail-bag.

    I have had some questions, stock questions, etc and I never can figure out where to post them.

    All the best!

    Ray

  61. Hey bro,

    I do the Fort Myers to Toronto a few times a year in one shot. I would love to have your little drive. Pick your return time Especially going through Georgia (Atlanta) I try to time my trip so I go through major centers and it’s not rush hour and use the bypasses. You will be surprised how quick you will be home. You might have to pinch yourself in OHIO (so flat) to stay awake 🙂 . In places 75 sucks right now the winter really did a number on the surface here and there. I like the drive. It grows on you. All the best and be safe!

  62. Enjoy the drive home. Maybe don’t rush through every state and take a little side detour every now and then. It’s a chance to visit a little, to enjoy life a little, to think things through, to take time for your self. Before you know it, life starts up all over again in MI. Family, friends, work, income, investing, etc. etc. Enjoy the drive!

  63. Hi,

    You asked me about visa’s for BG. I do know Canadians and Americans that live here, guess you must fall into one of those groups, my neighbours across the road are half American but are in Chicago at the minute, I have a friend though who lives about 40 minutes drive away, hes pure American and been here 5 years, he hasn’t bothered to get a visa but I’m sure he does know the official procedure even if he doesn’t do it himself. I too haven’t bothered with the official procedures for EU citizens residing here along with thousands of others 🙂 Anyway my friends partner is in UK at the moment and I believe we will be off there for a visit when she returns, I’ll ask him then what are the official formalities.

    Cheers,

    Dave…

  64. Have a safe trip! Enjoy the journey and savor the good things from the chapter that has just ended and the one that opens ahead. Thanks for letting us share in your story.

  65. I have been reading your blog for a while, thank you for the insight I have received. Please keep it up.

    On relationships. I have had plenty that have lasted 5 years, but only one that has ended up being more important than family, jobs, geographical location, money, or any of that other stuff. If you can get in the car and go back to Michigan, she may be wonderful, but she may not be the one. Good luck to you.

  66. DM – as you’ve heard it from everyone here – you can’t knock following your heart, your passions and what you love/want to enjoy out of life. If you and your girlfriend are meant to be, it will happen and you two will come together again – if not then there will be someone else that will compliment your life and also push you to grow even more, no doubt about it.

    Life definitely gets interesting as we get older and learn more and more about what we like, what we don’t like, what we want/don’t want, etc., etc., and sometimes you need to follow what your gut is saying and what makes you smile in the morning, afternoon and night – right? I

    know I have further evaluations to do this summer and hopefully the choices I make regarding items in my life turn out to be positive and push me towards my goals as well. These posts you share definitely help myself and others reflect on those items. Just need to continue to do what’s right, what makes you happy and everything falls into place.

    You have some driving to do sir – safe travels, eat healthy and rest up – talk to you when you land in the big state of Michigan DM.

    -Lanny

  67. The way that you describe your life lately is remarkable. The conflict of the relationships in your life that seem to battle each other is quite moving to hear you describe. Maybe it’s because I’m reading it all in my head that it makes you sound so calm, rational and decisive about the choices that you have made, when I’m not sure how I would handle it.

    Unfortunately I find myself in a somewhat similar situation, except I’ve only been with my girlfriend for a year and a half and she might potentially be moving 800 miles away to be closer to her family. I could give excuses that I own my house here, or my job wouldn’t let me, but those are only excuses for me. I could potentially go with her, still have my same job (I’m extremely lucky to have location flexibility) but if I do, I lose all of my family and friends for support. And I would be moving back to the city I went to college in, and I didn’t stay in that city because I simply didn’t like it. But the biggest thing that makes me hesitant, is that she would be moving to start fresh from some issues she has where we currently are and it just doesn’t seem planned out. I don’t know if there is a 2 year forecast as to where she sees herself, I’m not even sure if she has a 1 year forecast on this plan.

    At the moment this is still just one of many potential outcomes. I know that I would be happier close to my friends and family, moving away I would probably start to become a hermit who never leaves his house.

    Anyways, right now your story is particularly compelling to me and I truly wish you the best on your optimistic outlook.

    Drive safely.

    -Zee

  68. Perhaps you should figure out if YOU feature in her 2-year forecast before you follow her. Then again, I don’t know how old you are, but if it’s just boyfriend and girlfriend, I wouldn’t like to make such a huge decision on fickle feelings…

  69. Yeah, I’ve been trying to get as much information as I can without influencing her decision. If she decides to go then that also gives me information on what she’s thinking.

    Right now I’m trying to let her figure out what she thinks is best for her without me weighing in on her decision. If she decides that she wants a future with me in it then that means a lot more to me than if I keep prying at her plans and keep trying to insert myself into them. It’s probably not the best way to approach it, but I want to know her intentions since she’s the one that wants to make major changes.

  70. Good luck with everything! I know this was more a personal post than “investing related” but just want to let you know that when two people are meant to be together; their paths will eventually merge again no matter what. The opposite is also true. So, give time, time. I wish you and your partner the best. And cheers to new beginnings! 🙂 thanks for sharing and as always, looking forward to your posts.

  71. Joe,

    Thanks, man! Appreciate you stopping by. Hope all is good with RB40 Jr. 🙂

    I made it in about 19 hours this time around. Made great time, but construction zones for about half the entire trip really slowed me down. Tried to make it as frugal as possible with just gas/food stops.

    And we’re definitely committed to at least remaining friends. I owe her so much gratitude for being super supportive over the last few years. I feel bad about moving now, but I also have to stay true to who I am. I’m hopeful that she might be interested at some point in living up here. We’ll see!

    Hope you’re having a great holiday weekend.

    Cheers.

  72. Ray,

    That’s a great suggestion. If you have an idea on how best to initiate or promote that type of behavior, please let me know. As is, I currently receive quite a few emails that I either personally respond to (I never miss an email) or I answer here with a post – like I did recently with the DRIP vs. selective reinvestment article. That’s all initiated via the contact form at the top of the blog, but if you have a better way definitely let me know. Maybe I can do a mailbag type post once a week or every other week where I ask for questions or suggestions?

    Best regards!

  73. Paul N,

    Wow! I don’t envy your drive. That’s a hell of a haul. I made it in about 19 hours, which I consider pretty solid considering how much construction I ran into. I think half of Ohio was under construction. I did start to get pretty drowsy about halfway through Ohio there, but stopped and got a breakfast sandwich and felt much better afterwards.

    Atlanta was actually pretty nice. I think I went through there at about 9:30 p.m. or so and the traffic was pretty light.

    Stay safe on your travels! You’ve got some long road trips ahead of you.

    Take care.

  74. DivHut,

    I hear you. I arrived a little after 9 a.m. this morning, and it’s been crazy ever since! I guess I was trying to fit in what’s been going on over the last six months in one day. I’m just now getting to my computer, and that’s saying a lot for someone who lives on the laptop! 🙂

    I did enjoy the drive, however. Gave me plenty of time to reflect on what’s going on. In the end, I have no regrets. I really feel this was the best move for me at this time. I could have stayed in Florida and been quite comfortable, but it would have come at the expense of time with family. And while I was willing to take that trade for a little while, now that everyone’s getting a bit older and I’ve got a niece coming my perspective has changed a bit. We’ll see how it goes. I’m not totally against going back to Florida at some point, but would only do so if it was the best move for me and the other parties involved.

    Appreciate the kind words and thoughts. Hope you’re having a great weekend. 🙂

    Cheers.

  75. Greg,

    Thank you so much. It was a safe and really enjoyable trip, if a bit long.

    And I’ll definitely be making the most out of this big change in my life. I’m sad about what I’ve lost, but so excited and happy about what I’ve gained. I’ve found that everything in life has trade-offs, but, overall, it’s always about trying to maximize the benefits and minimize the drawbacks. And whenever one door closes, one bigger and better one soon opens.

    I’m happy to share my story. Especially when I’m sharing it with wonderful readers like yourself.

    Enjoy your holiday weekend!

    Best wishes.

  76. Dave,

    That’s interesting stuff there. I’ll definitely have to look a bit more into this. I’m always interested in cheap places to live, especially if visa laws are easy to navigate. 🙂

    Appreciate you stopping back by and sharing. Enjoy that super cheap lifestyle, my friend!

    Best regards.

  77. Dogstick,

    Thanks for your readership. I really appreciate it!

    I hear you on relationships. I don’t know if I’d ever choose a partner over family, but I understand what you’re saying here. However, it wasn’t easy for me to leave. It was incredibly difficult. But maybe it should have been even harder; maybe it should have been impossible. You make a good point there.

    Thanks for stopping by. 🙂

    Cheers.

  78. Lanny,

    Thanks for sharing that.

    You make some fantastic points there. In the end, we must follow our hearts and minds to pursue happiness in life. Ultimately, that’s really what the journey to financial independence is all about: happiness. It’s unfortunate when the occasion occurs that our pursuit causes others grief or pain, but it’s certainly not intentional. And sometimes we learn the most about ourselves during time of pain, and grow as people.

    I wish you the best with your own decisions and evaluations. I’m intimately aware of what consternation is like, but I can only hope that whatever you decide furthers your journey and increases your happiness, and even others’ happiness as well through growth and experience.

    Best wishes!

  79. austere,

    I definitely jammed to some good music on the way up. I would have packed some PB&J, but I kind of PB&J’d myself out a bit over the last few months. I splurged (gasp!) on some food on the go, but didn’t go too crazy. 🙂

    Thanks for the well wishes. Much appreciated. It was a nice trip.

    Have a great Memorial Day!

    Cheers.

  80. Zee,

    That’s a tough spot to find yourself in. I’m sorry to hear about that. I think you really need to think deeply about how you feel about this person and what you ultimately want out of your own life. I didn’t expressly say so, but I loved and still love my girlfriend. But I also knew I’d regret not moving back here and being near family again, and I didn’t want to hold that against her. I didn’t want to stay for her if it didn’t feel right at the risk of eventually destroying our relationship and also losing out on the time with loved ones. I believe in compromise, but I also think compromise has limits. Those limits, however, are all individualistic. What is too much for me may be perfectly fine for you. But I’d think long and hard about where you think this relationship is going and whether you see your goals and your life fitting in there. I wish you the best of luck either way!!!

    Take care.

  81. Mabelle,

    Thank you so much for that. I really appreciate the sweet words and support. I guess we’ll see if we’re truly meant to be. It wasn’t my intention to test the theory, but I suppose that’s how it will be. And I definitely plan on giving it time. 🙂

    Cheers to new beginnings, indeed!

    Enjoy your holiday weekend.

    Take care.

  82. Sorry, my English is very bad. congratulations on your blog, I am from Spain and thanks to this blog I discovered other very good companies. Do you think the DOW company?

    thanks

  83. I’ve been 700 miles away from my family for almost a decade. Been through a divorce. Put my life back together and found a kindred spirit along the way. Her family moved back to England after she grew up around here. We can both commiserate with not being close to family. It’s really hard. You see them once a year and its like a slide show watching them get older. It’s even harder since my entire family where i grew up somehow ended back up in the same area with me being the black sheep.

    Thank you for sharing your story/stories along the way. I keep coming back because every time i read your blog it inspires me to try and save that much more so that I have more options in the future to possibly make the move you did. I’m not there yet but someday.

    It often feels like a pipe-dream trying to get to F.I. but if i can save enough to roll into a much cheaper cost of living area, buy a house scotch free, have a decent dividend income cushion and take a much less stressful job with much lower income that sounds pretty damn nice to me. I should probably start crunching some numbers and seeing what I would be comfortable with. I’ve been hesitant to do that since it seems so far off.

    Strangely i always enjoyed watching grass grow while reading a good book, not sure why i’m so impatient with this one…. probably because of the task master micro managing boss with an ego streak that cracks his spiked whip every morning 😉

  84. Sorry to hear about the relationship. Change can be tough. In the end, you have to do what you think is best.

    Best wishes for the journey ahead Jason. I look forward to reading about new chapters…

    Mark

  85. vimasari,

    Thank you so much for following the blog from Spain. It’s so fantastic to have readers from all across the world. I appreciate your readership!

    I don’t actually follow DOW, as it’s not a prototypical dividend growth type stock. That could change over time, however, depending on how regularly and reliably they raise their dividend going forward. Sorry I couldn’t be of more help for you here.

    Best regards!

  86. Zol,

    Your first paragraph really resonates with me. A “slide show” is exactly how I’d describe my experience over the last few years, and as I started to realize I wasn’t happy with that I knew I had to change it. And I was also the black sheep, as most of my family all lives within 10 minutes of each other. Literally 10 minutes. And I’m almost as far away as you can possibly get!

    I wish you the best of luck if you decide to make a move like this. It wasn’t easy to leave behind what was a good life for me, but family is very important for me. Besides, it was such a relief to put in notice at the dealership and leave that job behind. There are pros and cons to everything in life, and this decision was certainly no different. I just felt the pros outweighed the cons.

    And the journey to financial independence is different for all of us. And not everyone has the same end goal. I would agree that being able to have your primary residence paid off and be able to take a lower paying job would most likely lead to a lot less stress in your life. Once your nut in life is low and easy to pay for, that takes a lot of the stress off of you. You don’t need to go out and work your ass off to pay for your lifestyle. Everything becomes much easier. That may not be true financial independence, but it’s certainly quite flexible. And I’d take that over the alternative of working 50 hours or so per week at a job I don’t enjoy!

    And don’t let that micromanager get to you. You’ll one day be the the boss of your own life, and that’s worth the wait. 🙂

    Cheers.

  87. Christian,

    Thanks so much!

    I had a fantastic Memorial Day weekend. It was probably the best one ever. The weather was phenomenal, and we had a backyard barbecue with burgers, hot dogs, and Italian sausages. Great stuff!!

    I hope you had a great weekend as well. It’s good to be back on here regularly again. 🙂

    Take care.

  88. Mark,

    Thanks so much for the support. I’m lucky to have such an understanding partner!

    And I look forward to your new chapters as well. Your growing dividend income remains a target for me. 🙂

    Best wishes.

  89. The worst part is the guys not actually that bad personally. But sh*t rolls down hill. And he is a yes man. So i get to step in puddles of it, every darn day. Cheers =P

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